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Forums / Male Performer Chat

To the Viewer Left Behind without a Warning
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Male Performer Chat: To the Viewer Left Behind without a Warning
Tristan_Normand
Created by: tristan_normand

7/1/20 @ 6:04am (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: Paris
Posts: 196

This is for a "spender" that I see writing reviews of a performer that has left suddenly and I feel badly for this spender:

It was incredible when you first met the performer here.
He was brand new, beautiful, a little rough and clumsy on performance, yet exhilarating to your senses.
Tentatively, you visited his chatroom at first. Explored his responses. Gauged his likes and dislikes.
Then you showered him with the presents.
Few at first.
Then as he acknowledged your presence and he gave favor to your position in his chatroom, the presents rained more and more upon him.
He gave you a "name" other than his screen name. You felt special and exalted.
When the chatroom filled up as the performer honed his talent and his performance started to zenith, he would start to pick you out in the crowd of screaming "spenders".
You wrote him wonderful reviews.
You rained tips and endless private sessions.
He called you by your "real name" that you divulged to him.
And he would give you first priority on private time.
You held in contempt those that would have him in exclusive private and wait fuming in the general chat when he was away from you.
So you showered him with incredible sums of credits.
Sometimes pushing your "CC" to the limits.
He somewhat promised meeting you when "all this is done". You thought in your head that somehow there would be a meeting and a fulfillment of the relationship.
You then tolerated his "exclusive privates". You rationalized that he is making money for the two of you.
You still waited outside in general chat and said "good night baby" when he finished with his newly found spender.
You helped him with his contests.
You became like his moderator.
You made more plans with him, he created a future for you.
One day/night he said, I'll see you tomorrow baby.

Then he was gone.

And the ensuing days, he never returned.

You maybe tried to write him here. Frantically called his flirtphone. Searched social media for his "given name".

He hasn't returned. He hasn't returned. Despite the hours and credits, he is gone. BUT, you were his number one fan. YOU were supposedly "his everything".

Please realize, the 2nd name gave you is not his real name. Not even close.

When he is hungry again, if his job doesn't work out, if his real relationship doesn't transpire, he will return.

This also happened to me a long time ago. You have to be here only for fun. You have to be on the outside for relationships.

Here the "relationship" starts in the middle. Naked and exposed as it is, this site is for fun only.
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Zepellin1994
Created by: zepellin1994

7/1/20 @ 10:04am (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 1

Preach it! Everyone read this OP again and again until it sinks in. Many who are F4F a long time feel the pain of this story. Some reading it might have a list of "buts" and excuses how this time, this model was different, but this happens ALL. THE.TIME! Give up on him. Is fantasy, is lies, even if he swears not
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Marc_Brantley
Created by: marc_brantley

7/1/20 @ 1:54pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 2

I am familiar with who this model is by the member posting. As for the other member, “S”, who was writing post exodus reviews, I am so sorry. He told me a bit about your “friendship”. His modus operandum was to tell everyone he wanted people to love him for his personality while gyrating his body and letting one feast their eyes on the slow exposure of nakedness, sometimes telling us that is all he has to offer here. His conversation was always the same thing. “I want to meet you when I am done with all this”. “I need to do this Camboy stuff to help my family”. He often said he does not care how someone looks, he only cares for what your soul is like inside. Blah blah blah.

You know.

Honestly, how many of these youngsters would pick someone significantly older than them. And we are all significantly older than these performers. Are there “geriatric-philes”? No there are no youngsters that initiate going after much, much older men. They would be known as gold diggers outside of the site.

At this point all I can say is be careful. Don’t try to meet on the outside or try to support him in anyway monetarily on the outside of the site.

And no, Justin is not his real name. A Czech lady friend of mine told me that is neither a Slovak nor Czech usual name. Otherwise, also, they would be called "Yustin". I saw his real name, it is a very, very Slovak name. Definitely not Justin. Leave it be, let him be. He is hanging out with people his own age.
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Zepellin1994
Created by: zepellin1994

7/1/20 @ 7:20pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 1

the point here is that it's not the experience of one man or one model or sometimes. It is a consistent trope that models offer "the boyfriend experience," and they are really flipping good at it. The second fake name, the promises, the expressions of love, the tampering of your jealousy, all for cash only. way too many perfect items on the OP list were exact matches for one of my early experiences and other commenters in forums throughout the years and years I have been here. take the heartbreak and learn from it, and the rest of you lonely hearts, be warned.
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Craigster777
Created by: craigster777

7/1/20 @ 8:50pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00


At this point all I can say is be careful. Don’t try to meet on the outside or try to support him in anyway monetarily on the outside of the site.


That is correct, "S", do not let him dupe you into giving money elsewhere. Some are young but they are sly and they have older mentors to help them set up getting money from you elsewhere. Sometimes it is a girlfriend that is a camgirl that knows how to set up outside accounts. Yeah, you thought he might have been gay, but he is an actor, a porn actor for Pete's sake. He has many fooled.
As expensive as it is compared to other sites, your financial information is safer on this site.
I know he was your "friend" for up to almost a year, but remember some guys are really strapped for cash and can really take measures to milk you for what they think you are worth based on your spending habits.
Think about it, what do you have to show that he has given you? Some VODs that are identical to other members' VODs? Promises of what exactly? A life together? He will forever be elusive and unobtainable.
Find another few models to follow to distract you for a while or take a break from here to clear your head.
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graybearphx
Created by: graybearphx

7/2/20 @ 2:59pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: Phoenix, Arizona
Posts: 569

My compliments to all of the above who commented on this, Definitely needs to be said, and kept in mind by new users in particular.
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HiddenHollow
Created by: hiddenhollow

7/2/20 @ 7:53pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 3

This makes my heart and stomach hurt. It's been 6-7 years since I was a high tipper here, thinking and hoping that I had a special place in the hearts of my eventual 2 favorite models. Ultimately I realized it was only my credits that gave me temporary value. Very painful lessons. I repeat what has been stated. You are paying for a performance, a fantasy. Real love and friendship do not require payment. Tristan_Normand--an eloquently worded post.
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Donatello Taylor
Created by: Donatello Taylor

7/2/20 @ 8:55pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00

People leave and come. That's life. It is a pity that trust also collapses because of this. And it is unfortunate that the situation also works the other way. For 3 years, I lost contact with many users here, simply because they stopped responding to me and coming (my spy skills allowed me to see that they are now hanging out with other models). I put all my soul and time into communication, I really thought that we were great friends. so lacked a simple truth like "I'm tired of you, bye"
Yes guys, you can say that I got my credits and you will be right. but these are my 5 cents and freedom of speech.
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HiddenHollow
Created by: hiddenhollow

7/2/20 @ 9:26pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 3

People leave and come. That's life. It is a pity that trust also collapses because of this. And it is unfortunate that the situation also works the other way. For 3 years, I lost contact with many users here, simply because they stopped responding to me and coming (my spy skills allowed me to see that they are now hanging out with other models). I put all my soul and time into communication, I really thought that we were great friends. so lacked a simple truth like "I'm tired of you, bye"
Yes guys, you can say that I got my credits and you will be right. but these are my 5 cents and freedom of speech.

So broken hearts on both sides. Tricky, these credit-born relationships. Models must also beware of giving their hearts and trust too freely, it seems. I am happy to be mostly an occasional observer now.
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ColinTexas
Created by: colintexas

7/2/20 @ 9:48pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00

"S", I know, it is hard to fathom "F.M." just left without any hint of his whereabouts. Especially after the credits and time, "meaningful conversations" and mainly the effort you put into making "F.M." number one in his studio.
I mean, you really did have him in lengthy privates in the beginning. I remember it well.
I can't even imagine the endless contests where he got more out of you than he gave back and I saw you trying to get others to help him out. It was fun to see him happy winning his 100 or 200 dollars after you spent a thousand or more to keep him in the lead.
DON'T LET HIM USE YOU ANYMORE!
It is tempting, given he knows how to play you. A lot of us are looking for what was described above as the "boyfriend experience". "F.M." was a lot of big spenders' boyfriend as harsh as it might sound. He was a great performer.
The business transactions are finished, he laughs all the way to the bank, we are left standing with empty wallets.
He keeps telling us, in his own words, "I am the most honestly (sic) model you will meet!" (Sound familiar?)
I suppose if he comes back when he runs out of money, you may go back to him, but just beware and be careful, it will be the same thing all over again where he gets more out of you than you get from him.
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MidPacificVulcan
Created by: midpacificvulcan

7/3/20 @ 2:41am (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 776

You may have been played for foolish deep pockets and left behind without warning. But maybe not. It is possible your favorite model got sick and can't broadcast. I've seen a couple show up for work here having beat themselves to a pulp in motorcycle accidents. He could have had to stay home to care for an aging parent, or his newborn baby. He may have been required by economics to get a better paying job. I knew one model who quit broadcasting after his mother turned him in to the Taliban. I remember one cute model about five years ago suddenly disappeared. I found out months later he had died. Your favorite may have married his other sugar daddy.

The point being your story and the responses may make for a nice life lesson, but they could all be off base. Or you may have proved the old saying, "A fool and his money are soon parted."
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Tristan_Normand
Created by: tristan_normand

7/3/20 @ 5:53am (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: Paris
Posts: 196

You may have been played for foolish deep pockets and left behind without warning. But maybe not. It is possible your favorite model got sick and can't broadcast. I've seen a couple show up for work here having beat themselves to a pulp in motorcycle accidents. He could have had to stay home to care for an aging parent, or his newborn baby. He may have been required by economics to get a better paying job. I knew one model who quit broadcasting after his mother turned him in to the Taliban. I remember one cute model about five years ago suddenly disappeared. I found out months later he had died. Your favorite may have married his other sugar daddy.

The point being your story and the responses may make for a nice life lesson, but they could all be off base. Or you may have proved the old saying, "A fool and his money are soon parted."


We really don't know how much truth there is to what information we were given. In this case, this model, also a porn star, is doing just fine, seen in social media just living his life. We are trying to help another member move on. This model is getting messages on his review page of "where are you" from his previous biggest supporter, but social media tells it all. The model is fine and is not thinking about him when he doesn't need his money.

I guess that I am just a skeptical person when it comes to excuses. I have been on the site long enough to hear a lot of excuses. I have been promised a private session the next day by the same model with "deals" and he never showed up. Excuses were always, "I was destroyed by my training in football" or "I had to help my mother in the garden". But he would show up later that day just fine or several days later but later he would mention a party where he got drunk and got smacked in the face the night before the promised morning private. I came to know this model well and who his biggest supporters were.

All I can say is that he is a 19 year old just living his life partying, having a good time with his earnings and doesn't know the impact of what he has done emotionally to his supporter that is here left high and dry.

My own experience from the past was another model I frequented for almost a year that tried to take me out of F4F. He disappeared for months and he came back telling me he had to take care of his sick father. He kept telling me the studio took too much of his money. He gave me information to do our own private screen time with his own camera and wanted to get paid outside of F4F. But outside of the studio, one can get careless. I asked him one day how his father was and he fumbled with the answer as he tried to remember what illness he told me. I saw in the mirror that in the background his girlfriend was in the reflection getting ready to leave as she got finished dressing, and worse of all, the straight porn playing getting ready for our session. Big boobed woman on the screen bouncing on some ugly guys dick. It was surreal and pretty hilarious. I then disappeared.

It's a big, wild world out there. Take heed of the warnings that you agreed to when you signed up for F4F and avoid contact outside of here. It may not get pretty. Everything here is fantasy, live it here, enjoy it here, and leave it here.

When you log off, you are logged off and living your "real life outside".

Member, "S", I hope you find peace.
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BobbyNite
Created by: bobbynite

7/3/20 @ 6:27am (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 77

You may have been played for foolish deep pockets and left behind without warning. But maybe not. It is possible your favorite model got sick and can't broadcast. I've seen a couple show up for work here having beat themselves to a pulp in motorcycle accidents. He could have had to stay home to care for an aging parent, or his newborn baby. He may have been required by economics to get a better paying job. I knew one model who quit broadcasting after his mother turned him in to the Taliban. I remember one cute model about five years ago suddenly disappeared. I found out months later he had died. Your favorite may have married his other sugar daddy.

The point being your story and the responses may make for a nice life lesson, but they could all be off base. Or you may have proved the old saying, "A fool and his money are soon parted."


Broadcasting in a Taliban run territory must have been risky.
Some models, I can believe. For some of them, I just have to take their stories with a grain of salt.
Also in a lot of places, this is the best place for them to make money quickly, not the factory or the restaurants or the stores where the pay is a pittance or even irregular.

Going back to the original post about the 2nd name. Models will give you a second fake name to make you feel special. So you will go on thinking that this is his real name. Just another layer of protection for them, a great sales ploy to keep you interested.
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Paul_Bryant
Created by: paul_bryant

7/3/20 @ 10:38am (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 20


Honestly, how many of these youngsters would pick someone significantly older than them. And we are all significantly older than these performers. Are there “geriatric-philes”? No there are no youngsters that initiate going after much, much older men. They would be known as gold diggers outside of the site.

“Geriatric-philes”! Ouch. The truth hurts. Theas models, especially the Bel Ami models wouldn’t single us out in a bar to take home if their lives depended on it. These youngsters are our toys on screen, and I know over half the stories we feed them about us also being “nineteen” years old and other wonderful things are not true either. Otherwise, our playground would not be here where we can live a fantasy land fake life.

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Created by: gofish

7/3/20 @ 10:43pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Location: IN YOUR DREAMS
Posts: 1,806

While one might form a specific connection to a model/performer on the site the fact is flirt is a fantasy site. There might be the odd connections between member and model that might last to some extent, but they are sure to be few.
As is often the case models who have left the site often return years later so be sure to FAV them if they were to your liking. :thumbsup :thumbsup
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TravisCarlton
Created by: traviscarlton

7/4/20 @ 6:39am (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 137

While one might form a specific connection to a model/performer on the site the fact is flirt is a fantasy site. There might be the odd connections between member and model that might last to some extent, but they are sure to be few.
As is often the case models who have left the site often return years later so be sure to FAV them if they were to your liking. :thumbsup :thumbsup

Just don't let the fantasy get to your head and link it to your bank account. The models are here to make money, not really for your love. Sorry to splash cold water on your face.

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MartianMike
Created by: martianmike

7/8/20 @ 1:12pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00

Viewer and Performer saying/typing I love you, I really do, after having "simultaneous?" orgasms during a show.
Viewer telling performer intimacies as the performer gives the viewer the time of his life.
Performer telling viewer they have never met any other viewer like them as the tips roll in.
"I want to meet you in person."
etcetera etcetera etcetera...
Live it here, leave it here....like someone said above.
Do not bank on a future and and not throw your bank account at it.
It is living for the moment.
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Ammo
Created by: ammo

7/9/20 @ 2:33am (EST) |UTC - 5:00
Posts: 41

I guess most of us can empathise with these comments. We just have to be careful with our hard earned money. Some of the models are honest and worthy of pursuing a friendship with but you have to keep things in perspective. Mostly they are in poor countries where it is difficult to make a living so they need to make money somehow. This does not make them bad guys.
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Dan Harding
Created by: Dan Harding

7/9/20 @ 11:16am (EST) |UTC - 5:00

This is for a "spender" that I see writing reviews of a performer that has left suddenly and I feel badly for this spender:

It was incredible when you first met the performer here.
He was brand new, beautiful, a little rough and clumsy on performance, yet exhilarating to your senses.
Tentatively, you visited his chatroom at first. Explored his responses. Gauged his likes and dislikes.
Then you showered him with the presents.
Few at first.
Then as he acknowledged your presence and he gave favor to your position in his chatroom, the presents rained more and more upon him.
He gave you a "name" other than his screen name. You felt special and exalted.
When the chatroom filled up as the performer honed his talent and his performance started to zenith, he would start to pick you out in the crowd of screaming "spenders".
You wrote him wonderful reviews.
You rained tips and endless private sessions.
He called you by your "real name" that you divulged to him.
And he would give you first priority on private time.
You held in contempt those that would have him in exclusive private and wait fuming in the general chat when he was away from you.
So you showered him with incredible sums of credits.
Sometimes pushing your "CC" to the limits.
He somewhat promised meeting you when "all this is done". You thought in your head that somehow there would be a meeting and a fulfillment of the relationship.
You then tolerated his "exclusive privates". You rationalized that he is making money for the two of you.
You still waited outside in general chat and said "good night baby" when he finished with his newly found spender.
You helped him with his contests.
You became like his moderator.
You made more plans with him, he created a future for you.
One day/night he said, I'll see you tomorrow baby.

Then he was gone.

And the ensuing days, he never returned.

You maybe tried to write him here. Frantically called his flirtphone. Searched social media for his "given name".

He hasn't returned. He hasn't returned. Despite the hours and credits, he is gone. BUT, you were his number one fan. YOU were supposedly "his everything".

Please realize, the 2nd name gave you is not his real name. Not even close.

When he is hungry again, if his job doesn't work out, if his real relationship doesn't transpire, he will return.

This also happened to me a long time ago. You have to be here only for fun. You have to be on the outside for relationships.

Here the "relationship" starts in the middle. Naked and exposed as it is, this site is for fun only.



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Brian_Spunks
Created by: brian_spunks

7/10/20 @ 1:31pm (EST) |UTC - 5:00

I once befriended two young Slovak models in a duo. They were drinking during our private and loosened up a bit and told me that in their studio, the models had discussed there were two particular types of clients that stand out from the other types. One spender, as he gestured with a jerking off motion with his hand then whistling pffffft, is one that only wants to get off without a lot of credits spent. The other spender wants not only the sex show, but also "friendship", coddling, and an emotional connection. The latter is the one that can keep coming back and will keep the credits coming in more and more as they demand more and more of your attention. These spenders will help with contests, and give the long paying private shows and big tips to "help you out". You ask these spenders their name, and you give them an imaginary "real" name of yourselves for them to latch on to. Ask them about their lives and show interest and tell them a story about your life. Create a fantasy for them. Seems like it should be easy for the spenders to know when they are getting played, but this is a process that occurs over a period of time. I have seen in different rooms, the presence of very prominent "spenders" calling the model a name other than the screen name. How many "spenders" out there know that they are getting played?
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